A/N: This fic is a response to reader58’s challenge on NWP to revive Ben, and bring him to TC. :)

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A Step Of Faith - Chapter 2: Reunions

There were times when Ben still found himself feeling lost…when he didn’t know what he was supposed to do, or what was expected of him. He felt like that now, as he sat in Max’s office, looking across at his little sister, her eyes filled with emotions that he wasn’t sure he wanted to name.

It was a little comforting, though, that she didn’t seem to know what to do either.

She hadn’t said anything else beyond his name, just moved back towards her office, silently asking him to follow.

Ben was afraid…afraid that Max would tell him to leave and never come back, afraid that she hated him for what he’d done.

He couldn’t blame her. Every hunt, every life he’d taken…some part of him had enjoyed it.

He deserved to be hated. He knew that.

“They brought you back.”

Max’s voice was quiet, gentle in the way it had been that night in the Space Needle. But there was something else in it…something like regret.

Was she sorry that he was here…that he was alive?

Ben swallowed thickly.

“Max, I-” he started.

But, before he could finish, he heard the office door open behind him, and another voice -- his voice, impossible as that was -- asked in a rush, “Max, what’s going on?! Mole said-”

The demand was cut short the moment Ben turned around.

Standing in the doorway, was a perfect replica of him: the same dark blond hair, the same hazel-green eyes…identical…even down to the wide-eyed expression of shock.

Ben wondered if he were seeing things. He hadn’t hallucinated before, not that he knew of, anyway, but this…this couldn’t be real.

Ben turned back to Max, wanting to ask if she could see him, too, when he saw her nod to his double.

“It’s really him,” she said quietly.

It took Ben a moment to realize what she meant.

His twin’s gaze came to rest on him once again, a strange expression that Ben didn’t understand flitting over his face before he shuttered it away.

If it were possible, Ben felt even more lost than he had before. Of all the things he had imagined happening when he saw Max again, this certainly hadn’t been one of them.

“Are you…” Ben tried uncertainly, “are you my-”

“Twin?” his double cut him off with a nod. “494. Guess where we were concerned, Manticore decided they couldn’t have just one. Not that I blame them.” He smirked, but the expression didn’t reach his eyes. “I’d ask if you remember me, but since we only met in a test tube, I figure the chances of that are pretty small. I’m Alec.”

“Ben.”

“I know.”

The hard edge to his voice was unmistakable, and though he didn’t know why, Ben felt a sharp stab of guilt.

His twin…Alec…moved into the office to lean casually against the desk, but Ben couldn’t help but wonder if he wanted to be in a better position to protect Max. To protect her from him.

Silence fell once again, thick with tension, and none of them seemed sure where to start.

“So,” Alec asked finally, folding his arms across his chest, “are you still nuts?”

Max didn’t seem to appreciate the question.

“Alec!” she hissed.

He shrugged unapologetically, but his expression softened a little as he looked at her.

“We need to know.”

“I have meds.”

That drew both Max’s and Alec’s attention back to him, but while Max seemed relieved, his double’s gaze was unreadable.

“Amazing what Psy-Ops could do,” his twin said at last.

The words were simple, almost casual, but something in Ben cringed at them. He turned away, suddenly unable to meet his twin’s eyes.

He missed the warning look Max gave Alec, but the sound of the door opening again cut off what she had started to say.

Ben wasn’t sure if he wanted to see who it was, afraid this day might become even more confusing, when he realized it was same the nomlie who’d lead him through TC earlier.

“Now what, Mole?” Max demanded.

“Sorry to interrupt the tearful reunion,” Mole apologized sarcastically, “but the surveillance team you sent out just got back, and they’re waitin’ ta be debriefed. Nate says the heist might be harder than they thought, but thinks they can pull it off. Wants ta see if they’ve still got the go-ahead.”

Max glanced hesitantly at Ben, slowly starting to rise from her seat, but Alec held up a hand.

“Tell ‘em I’ll be right there,” he said, turning back to the nomlie.

“Alec, you don’t have to-” Max started.

He didn’t say anything else, but something in his expression must have stopped her protest. She studied him for a moment, then finally nodded. He tipped his head in answer, and the smallest of grateful smiles touched Max’s lips.

Ben couldn’t help but wonder how close they were.

His twin gave him a long look, one that was not quite threatening but a warning just the same, and pushed himself from the desk.

The sound of the door closing seemed to echo in the small office.

The room was silent for long moment, until Max spoke again, her quiet voice drawing Ben’s attention once more.

“Manticore thought our twins would escape, too.”

A chill ran down Ben’s back as he realized what she meant, her words conjuring imagines of cold medical tables, red lasers, and pain. Suddenly his twin’s attitude made perfect sense. A cold knot of dread settled in his stomach as he realized that Alec might have had to pay for much more than just the escape.

“When I…” Ben swallowed thickly, “Did they…?”

“Psy-Ops.”

Her tone wasn’t accusing, but Ben felt something in him recoil, and he dropped his gaze. Re-indoctrination and Psy-Ops had been the embodiment of everything he feared, and he had put his twin through both.

He’d thought…hoped…that Max was the only one who had reason to hate him, but he should have known it was too much to hope for.

And, maybe, he’d never had the right to hope for it in the first place.

He waited for her to speak again, waited for her to look at him with loathing and demand that he leave, but when he forced himself to meet her gaze, tears, not condemnation, had filled his little sister’s dark eyes.

“I’m sorry.”

Ben flinched, caught off guard. Max’s voice had been so soft that he had barely heard her, but so filled with regret that it startled him.

His mind reeled. Why would she…

Max pushed herself back from the desk, moving to stare out the window. She wrapped her arms around her middle, her shoulders hunched, looking smaller than Ben had ever seen her.

“It’s my fault.”

Her fault? But…

“I shouldn’t have left you there. I should have found a way.”

Ben was too stunned to speak, disbelief, shame, and a thousand objections darting through his mind. The realization that she blamed herself for what had happened hit him harder than any blow ever had.

He’d never thought that she’d…

He wished so badly in that moment that he had the right words, that he could somehow fix everything. A cruel voice in the back of his mind whispered that he was a failure, a broken soldier who was no longer of use to anyone.

But Ben forced that voice away, and pushed himself from his chair, taking a few slow steps forward. It might be useless, but he had to try.

“Maxie,” he started, “I…I don’t remember a lot after, but…I remember before. I asked you to…I wanted you to.”

Max shook her head, adamantly refusing his comfort. She drew a shaky breath, her eyes closing as she worked to keep her emotions at bay.

“I should have found a way,” she whispered at last. “I should have saved you.”

“You did.” He didn’t know if that was the right thing to say, he only knew that it was true, and right now, the truth was all he had. “You did save me. Maybe not the way you thought you had, but…they brought me back…they fixed what was wrong with me.”

Max turned from the window finally, her eyes piercing in a way that made Ben feel as though she could see right through him. He didn’t know what she was looking for, but he forced himself to meet her gaze.

After a moment, some of the pain in her expression eased, a mix of relief and hope slowly growing in it’s place.

“How did they…?” she asked at last.

“I don’t know. I just…woke up. One of the scientists said something about cybernetics, but I…”

Max paled suddenly.

“Like Zack,” she whispered hoarsely.

“Zack?” Ben swallowed. “Is he here?”

Max looked away again, pain -- guilt -- flaring once more. “No, he…he got hurt. They brought him back, but they did something to his mind, made him believe things that weren’t true. He doesn’t remember any of it now.”

The stab of regret Ben felt was mingled with relief…he wasn’t sure he could face Zack’s accusing eyes.

“He came to find me once,” Ben said quietly.

“He did?”

An image of Zack, the last time he had seen him, flashed through his mind. Zack had been angry, very angry.

Ben nodded.

“Told me he couldn’t protect me anymore if I didn’t stop…that he couldn’t risk the others. I…I never saw him again after that.” The thought of his other brothers and sisters made Ben pause, a flicker of hope rising within him. “Are any of the others…?” he tried.

Max shook her head.

“I saw Krit and Syl…but I don’t know where they are now. Brin…Tinga…they’re gone.”

Disbelief flooded him, and grief quickly followed. Tinga been a little older than him, the same age Eva, their big sister, had been. Brin had been closer to Max’s age. He wished, not for the first time, that he had tried to find his siblings…tried to see them again, at least once. But his mind had been filled only with thoughts of the hunt, and of Her, and nothing else had mattered.

“Manticore,” Max started to explain, “They…”

The words caught in her throat, and her arms tightened around her waist, trying to will away the pain. Ben reached a hand towards her, hoping to comfort her. She turned suddenly and wrapped her arms around him, burying her face in his denim jacket.

Startled, he hesitated for a moment, then tentatively wrapped his arms around her in return.

“I’m glad you’re back, big brother,” Max whispered softly.

TBC...

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A/N: Again, this is a story that's been sitting on the shelf for a long time. Inspiration and time have been taken up by other things... *ducks head* But as long as the Lord allows, I do plan to finish it.

I hope you enjoyed it, and please let me know what you think! :)

-Laughter

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| Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 |

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